Skaters - who are they? Researches of brave naturalists :)
Recently the meetings of people with unknown earlier beings became frequent. The basic distinctive feature of these beings is their hind legs. In distinction from other animals, these beings have unusual apophysises, supplied with wheels, that's why these beings are called skaters. Our fearless scientists-naturalists spent a lot of time, investigating these beings, some of them even managed to take root into their groups and to study skaters from within. We publish the first results of our researches - classification of kinds of skaters.
At once it is necessary to notice that there are 2 groups of skaters - so-called "fitnesoid" and so-called "agressivelike". Our research touches only "fitnesoid" group, because we don't have the authentic data about the "agressivelike" as the meetings with the "agressivelikes" are very dangerous and some of the scientists were lost, trying to study frightened away flight of "agressivelike" skaters.
So:
Baby-skaters
All skaters, even the biggest and the most terrible, develop from the so-called babies. It's difficult to imagine that the most outstanding individuals of running skaters and dodge skaters were babies some time ago. But it is true. The scientists assert that already at the baby stage there should be intraspecific distinctions but as all the babies are very similar and all keep together, yet it was not possible to establish external specific distinctions of them. Size of the babies is very similar to the grown-up's size. The baby's basic attributes are the straight legs, shivering knees and burdensome meditations - whether to remove a regular brake or to wash bearings. Scientists managed to establish, that with the help of meditations over the regular brake wise nature carries out natural selection of the babies. It is established, that in the skater's life the skater needs fast reaction. If a baby for any reasons possesses slowed down reactions during meditations over removal of the brake, it has not time to brake and he would be broken by the obstacles on his own way, or he would become an "easy meat" for the larger predators - so-called cars. Thus, from the genetic fund the unusable material is rejected at once. The value of meditations about washing bearings is not established yet, probably, they somehow prepare babies for the adult life.
Kinds of skaters:
Dodge skaters.
They usually live in the small closed territories. As a rule, it is not so far from the concentration of food and drinks. All free time they spend moving between the small multi-colored subjects scattered in territory of dwelling. It is considered, that such behavior should cause dizziness of the predators and is the form of protective behavior. Dodge skaters have the strongly advanced territorial instinct, and they aggressively protect the territory not only from essences of other kinds and other kinds of skaters, but also from the individuals of the same kind which don't belong to this flight. Distinctive feature of their appearance - absolute absence of horny apophysises on the knees of the back limbs which frequently skaters of other kinds have. Thus similar apophysises on elbows and the ends of the fore limbs can be seen frequently enough. Nowadays people try to cultivate dodge skaters. They make attempts to catch dodge skaters and even to arrange exhibitions of dodge skaters with delivery of diplomas and medals to champion individuals.
Figured skaters.
They are very similar to the dodge skaters, but need, as a rule, a little bit bigger territory. Also the territory shouldn't be covered with the multi-colored subjects. As a rule, the figured skater moves with the greater speed, than the dodge skater and during the movement frequently uses jumps, and dodge skater jumps very seldom.
Running skaters.
It is the fastest kind of skaters. They live on the extensive territories though prefer to appear in the certain places. During evolution they had obtained the superfluous wheel on the skate apophysis of the leg and a horn outgrowth on a head. It is supposed, that this outgrowth protects their heads from the predators' attacks and can be used during marriage male duels. The running skater has the brightest coloration among all skaters. Originally was considered, that such coloration serves for attraction of the individuals of an opposite sex, but the experiment showed, that it is very difficult to descry the moving running skater even with such bright coloration, and if the skater of an opposite sex can see the running skater, he (she) wouldn't ever catch him (her). Therefore the question about their coloring remained undetermined.
Virtual skaters
Are the most poorly observable skaters. One of the popular beliefs says that they do not exist, and it is a legend like the yeti as almost all found traces of their presence, but nobody saw them. Usually the traces of ability to live of the virtual skater can be found out in so-called forums - not investigated by science natural formations, which allow skaters to communicate on distance. No one has ever seen the virtual skater's and, and available numerous certificates of eyewitnesses are not proved.
Chaotic skaters.
The most widespread kind of skaters. It is characterized by the big number of individuals in flights. The usual behavior - chaotic movement through all territory of dwelling, that's why they are called so. Some scientists distinguish two subspecies of skaters chaotic - skaters chaotic settled, who occupy rather small territory (this territory is comparable to the territory of figured skaters, but in this case on this territory live much more individuals), and skaters chaotic migrating which migrate on rather extensive territories. But some observers specify, that the same individuals have been noticed both in structure of settled and in structure of migrating flights. Probably, here we deal with variations of skaters' behavior of the same kind. It is interesting, that movements of chaotic skaters settled represent such impressing show, that superstitious local residents think that these movements are some kind of spiritualism and that's why one of the folksy names of this kind is sorcerers.
All-weather skaters
Sometimes all-weather skaters refer to chaotic skaters as very frequently they migrate together, however there are essential differences which allow allocating these skaters into a separate kind. In dry and warm weather the behavior of all-weather skaters does not differ in any way from the behavior of chaotic skaters. But during the season of rains the chaotic skater usually hides in hollows and runs into hibernation, and when the frost begin he sprout a special organ on the back limbs for movement on snow. (This organ, for want of something better, has the working name "board"). The all-weather skater leads an active life the year round. Such behavior is effective enough both for hunting, and for protection against a predator as both the take and the predator, having met beings with skates in the winter, react equally - die away with surprise. After that the all-weather skater can eat the take, or leave slowly from the predator.
Bench skaters.
Widespread enough kind of skaters, but it is strongly distinguished from all set forth above. First time even was considered, that Bench skaters are not real skaters, but the individuals, pretending skaters. But after the scientists were asked a question: "What the hell someone pretends skater for?", prevailed the opinion, that the bench skater nevertheless is an offspring of skaters' evolution. Most likely, this kind has developed in conditions of abundance of food and while other kinds of skaters developed aside increases in speed and maneuverability for protection against predators, evolution of bench skaters has gone on the way of escalating of the body's weight. Therefore the bench skaters lead an inactive way of life, consuming whenever possible high-calorific food. Intensive researches of bench skaters are held now as if the hypothesis that organisms of bench skaters as a result of evolution can synthesize chlorophyll it would be the greatest development - the first fixed transition from the animal condition to the vegetative.
Written by
Victor Treshchalin
Recently the meetings of people with unknown earlier beings became frequent. The basic distinctive feature of these beings is their hind legs. In distinction from other animals, these beings have unusual apophysises, supplied with wheels, that's why these beings are called skaters. Our fearless scientists-naturalists spent a lot of time, investigating these beings, some of them even managed to take root into their groups and to study skaters from within. We publish the first results of our researches - classification of kinds of skaters.
At once it is necessary to notice that there are 2 groups of skaters - so-called "fitnesoid" and so-called "agressivelike". Our research touches only "fitnesoid" group, because we don't have the authentic data about the "agressivelike" as the meetings with the "agressivelikes" are very dangerous and some of the scientists were lost, trying to study frightened away flight of "agressivelike" skaters.
So:
Baby-skaters
All skaters, even the biggest and the most terrible, develop from the so-called babies. It's difficult to imagine that the most outstanding individuals of running skaters and dodge skaters were babies some time ago. But it is true. The scientists assert that already at the baby stage there should be intraspecific distinctions but as all the babies are very similar and all keep together, yet it was not possible to establish external specific distinctions of them. Size of the babies is very similar to the grown-up's size. The baby's basic attributes are the straight legs, shivering knees and burdensome meditations - whether to remove a regular brake or to wash bearings. Scientists managed to establish, that with the help of meditations over the regular brake wise nature carries out natural selection of the babies. It is established, that in the skater's life the skater needs fast reaction. If a baby for any reasons possesses slowed down reactions during meditations over removal of the brake, it has not time to brake and he would be broken by the obstacles on his own way, or he would become an "easy meat" for the larger predators - so-called cars. Thus, from the genetic fund the unusable material is rejected at once. The value of meditations about washing bearings is not established yet, probably, they somehow prepare babies for the adult life.
Kinds of skaters:
Dodge skaters.
They usually live in the small closed territories. As a rule, it is not so far from the concentration of food and drinks. All free time they spend moving between the small multi-colored subjects scattered in territory of dwelling. It is considered, that such behavior should cause dizziness of the predators and is the form of protective behavior. Dodge skaters have the strongly advanced territorial instinct, and they aggressively protect the territory not only from essences of other kinds and other kinds of skaters, but also from the individuals of the same kind which don't belong to this flight. Distinctive feature of their appearance - absolute absence of horny apophysises on the knees of the back limbs which frequently skaters of other kinds have. Thus similar apophysises on elbows and the ends of the fore limbs can be seen frequently enough. Nowadays people try to cultivate dodge skaters. They make attempts to catch dodge skaters and even to arrange exhibitions of dodge skaters with delivery of diplomas and medals to champion individuals.
Figured skaters.
They are very similar to the dodge skaters, but need, as a rule, a little bit bigger territory. Also the territory shouldn't be covered with the multi-colored subjects. As a rule, the figured skater moves with the greater speed, than the dodge skater and during the movement frequently uses jumps, and dodge skater jumps very seldom.
Running skaters.
It is the fastest kind of skaters. They live on the extensive territories though prefer to appear in the certain places. During evolution they had obtained the superfluous wheel on the skate apophysis of the leg and a horn outgrowth on a head. It is supposed, that this outgrowth protects their heads from the predators' attacks and can be used during marriage male duels. The running skater has the brightest coloration among all skaters. Originally was considered, that such coloration serves for attraction of the individuals of an opposite sex, but the experiment showed, that it is very difficult to descry the moving running skater even with such bright coloration, and if the skater of an opposite sex can see the running skater, he (she) wouldn't ever catch him (her). Therefore the question about their coloring remained undetermined.
Virtual skaters
Are the most poorly observable skaters. One of the popular beliefs says that they do not exist, and it is a legend like the yeti as almost all found traces of their presence, but nobody saw them. Usually the traces of ability to live of the virtual skater can be found out in so-called forums - not investigated by science natural formations, which allow skaters to communicate on distance. No one has ever seen the virtual skater's and, and available numerous certificates of eyewitnesses are not proved.
Chaotic skaters.
The most widespread kind of skaters. It is characterized by the big number of individuals in flights. The usual behavior - chaotic movement through all territory of dwelling, that's why they are called so. Some scientists distinguish two subspecies of skaters chaotic - skaters chaotic settled, who occupy rather small territory (this territory is comparable to the territory of figured skaters, but in this case on this territory live much more individuals), and skaters chaotic migrating which migrate on rather extensive territories. But some observers specify, that the same individuals have been noticed both in structure of settled and in structure of migrating flights. Probably, here we deal with variations of skaters' behavior of the same kind. It is interesting, that movements of chaotic skaters settled represent such impressing show, that superstitious local residents think that these movements are some kind of spiritualism and that's why one of the folksy names of this kind is sorcerers.
All-weather skaters
Sometimes all-weather skaters refer to chaotic skaters as very frequently they migrate together, however there are essential differences which allow allocating these skaters into a separate kind. In dry and warm weather the behavior of all-weather skaters does not differ in any way from the behavior of chaotic skaters. But during the season of rains the chaotic skater usually hides in hollows and runs into hibernation, and when the frost begin he sprout a special organ on the back limbs for movement on snow. (This organ, for want of something better, has the working name "board"). The all-weather skater leads an active life the year round. Such behavior is effective enough both for hunting, and for protection against a predator as both the take and the predator, having met beings with skates in the winter, react equally - die away with surprise. After that the all-weather skater can eat the take, or leave slowly from the predator.
Bench skaters.
Widespread enough kind of skaters, but it is strongly distinguished from all set forth above. First time even was considered, that Bench skaters are not real skaters, but the individuals, pretending skaters. But after the scientists were asked a question: "What the hell someone pretends skater for?", prevailed the opinion, that the bench skater nevertheless is an offspring of skaters' evolution. Most likely, this kind has developed in conditions of abundance of food and while other kinds of skaters developed aside increases in speed and maneuverability for protection against predators, evolution of bench skaters has gone on the way of escalating of the body's weight. Therefore the bench skaters lead an inactive way of life, consuming whenever possible high-calorific food. Intensive researches of bench skaters are held now as if the hypothesis that organisms of bench skaters as a result of evolution can synthesize chlorophyll it would be the greatest development - the first fixed transition from the animal condition to the vegetative.
Written by
Victor Treshchalin
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